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[acknowledges]

Taco Salad is not happy to help you. Taco Salad hungers for justice, and for a bite of whatever you're eating.

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[acknowledges]

[He's no stranger to crying in front of other people, even if it is a little embarrassing, and even if it only makes him look even more uncool. Naruto wears his heart on his sleeve for better and for worse. He isn't ashamed of the depth to which he feels things, or the importance of the people he cares about. Every conversation he's had with Sakura and Sasuke has felt like all three of them were just moving around some invisible thing in the room with them, this thing they couldn't name or change or talk about. Naruto knows that they're keeping secrets from him in the same way that he knows, in his stomach, that they're doing it to keep him safe- that they aren't trying to hurt him and that they're just doing their best.

But in that- in the small admissions that they have made, in the way their eyes find his only to slide away- it hurts. It's unreal how much it hurts. Time and again Naruto thinks I failed you. He knows he has his world to go back to, that he still has to do a lot more stuff to get to the point in time his friends are from, but that doesn't erase the sadness. He doesn't know how to fix that any more than he knows what to do to find peace and end the years of hatred and revenge that have consumed all their lives. He doesn't know how this happened. Because he should have stopped it.

Sasuke and Sakura- they're the first people to have known him and accepted him, and they did it when no one else would. Naruto loves them both, fiercely, but if that's really true-

How did he let this happen?
How did he stand by for it?
How could they have fought so hard, for so long, and settled for this?

He can't talk about it with them the same way, because it isn't their burden to bear. They're living with the consequences of actions Naruto can't fathom and in that quiet the words are adding up. He feels like he's suffocating beneath them.

The mattress dips as Bolin shifts and Naruto moves in turn an echo for a gesture he doesn't even recognize yet. And then there are arms around him. For the span of two heartbeats, Naruto's body is rigid with surprise. He can count on one hand the number of times he's been hugged like this- that he'd been able to feel the rise and fall of someone's chest against his own, that he'd been able to fit his chin over someone's shoulder and heard their voice near his ear. Bolin doesn't reach for him like he's scared. It isn't pity or fear or congratulations. He doesn't have a name for the way it feels, it just feels- and Naruto, hands trembling, recognizes the moment he could pull away and instead throws himself into it, trusting that he'll be caught. Naruto's arms wrap around his shoulder and chest, they roll along the mattress in his push to get closer, and his face is buried in the slope of Bolin's neck as if he's the only solid thing in the whole world.]

[sediments]

[ There's more. He knows that there's more, probably a tangent of thoughts swirling around Naruto's head, that's so clear and certain in his chest and his mind but so difficult to put into words. Difficult because there's so much feeling, that it's difficult to communicate everything.

He wants to hear it, maybe not today, but someday, so it's not trapped in a helpless circle in Naruto's mind. So that Naruto can put it down, make it tangible and progress out of the thing so encompassing and vague and painful inside him. If he can. Bolin doesn't know. This process of timelines and world hopping is complicated, and he can't even tell if when they'll go back they'll remember everything they learned here.

Probably not. And that's the most frustrating thing, because it means that they can't even incite change with what they learn here. The futility of it is frustrating, to the point where even Bolin is at a loss for positivity.

He doesn't say anything when Naruto returns the hug, just squeezing him tighter and frowning fiercely where Naruto can't see. There's tension and struggle there, come on so quick and wholly, like it had been lying in wait under the surface all along. It's going to keep going on from here on out before it's not as though there are any solutions offered between them, but Bolin is here, his hands pressing hard against Naruto's shoulder blades, feeling the pattern of his ribs against one of his arms. He's here, and he's going to give it all that he's got, even if it isn't much. ]

[acknowledges]

[He doesn't cry the way he otherwise might, but that's because it feels like the moment he's about to, Bolin is there to catch him. His eyes squeeze shut and the tension threaded through his body snaps like a cut string; it's as if he just can't hold it any longer. Maybe that's true. Bolin asked him what he missed most and the words just start spilling out of him.]

I miss the house I always lived in, even though it's dirty 'cause I haven't seen it in months. I miss my friends that're all counting on me, and the people important to me that've died. I wanted my master to watch me grow up and do everything we talked about and I didn't get to say goodbye. I miss Neji who died 'cause he believed in me.

I miss my parents I never got to see and Iruka-sensei and Kakashi-sensei who were always looking out for me- and Obaa-san shouting at me even though she's the Hokage. I miss having chakra and bein' able to practice jutsu. I miss all the streets I walked on and my friends from other villages and the playground I used to stay in and the kids that nagged me to train with them. I even miss Kurama and we only just became friends.

[The breaths shudder out of him. Naruto's grip doesn't change around Bolin's body- his forehead pressed into the skin of his throat and the pattern of inhale-exhale rocking out of him.]

I miss everything'attebayo.

And I'm gonna miss everything here when it's gone too.

[sediments]

[ That's a lot; a lot of people and places, and it gets Bolin to smile against Naruto's hair, not because it's tickling his nose. He's glad to hear it, if he's honest, because he was wondering what kind of place Naruto had come from, because he couldn't pick up on what the other Hero was yearning for, what he missed, what he thought of when they were silent. So he's glad that there's so much, and that Naruto has a life that he loves to go back to.

Because if it was just duty or a war, he's not sure that he'd want that for Naruto.

His hand moves on Naruto's back, patting him between the shoulder blades, light enough that the gesture doesn't even vibrate all the way to Naruto's breath. Reminiscent of his parents when he was young—of all parents probably, but it's not as though Naruto would know. ]

Yeah, it sucks.

[ Because it does, and it's not as though there's anything either of them can physically do about it, like tear a hole that would taken them back to their homes. It just sucks, and they're allowed to wallow and be sad, and think about how frustrating it is to be in this position. He wants to go home too, even if it hurts to think about how much he'll miss this. ]

But you'll get back... It's possible! I've seen it happen. And I'm going to miss you a lot too.

[acknowledges]

[He's not saying it because he's homesick. It doesn't have the same resonance that Bolin's words do when he talks about it- like it's the one thing always on his mind. Naruto loves his village because it's the only home he knows, but he also understands what it means to leave it behind. Travel is associated with growth and in this way, being here in Blanc is an extension of that mentality.

He's saying it because Bolin asked him to, and because he can't stop replaying all of his memories, over and over again, when Sakura lapses into silence and when Sasuke doesn't meet his gaze. He doesn't know to to make his peace with this as their future because in a way, it means that whatever he goes back to, it's the beginning of the end. Maybe there'll be good things once the war is really over, and yeah, maybe it'll mean peace for the shinobi world. But the things he'd wanted to desperately to get back are gone; here with him in Caissa is proof.

There's a graveyard of things Naruto has never grieved.

Against Bolin's shoulder, Naruto shakes his head, swallows the rest, and lets his breathing even back out.]

[sediments]

[ Bolin's mind wanders. His thoughts wander from the questions that he has about Naruto's home, and his relationship with Sakura and Sasuke to thinking about Adrasteius again, and the finality of their relationship now, and how he wishes— he wishes—

Something, but he doesn't know what. Maybe just an excuse to bring him back under the pretence of unfinished business.

But his thoughts flit away again to Mako, who's the one person he'd summon if he had fancy abilities like that when the press of Naruto's chest against his own during a particularly long exhale catches his attention, and he thinks instead about Opal, and how he would forget how much he missed being physically close with her every time until he saw her again. He misses it now; wants it now - the far away ache of longing for a certain connection.

Then, he shifts his head so that his chin is pressed to the top of Naruto's head while his gaze moves across the room. ]

Do you want to skip the flower shop and get noodles?

[ He thinks about how happy Naruto had seemed at having received the flowers from Sakura, and it brings a small smile to his lips. ]

[acknowledges]

[He laughs. It's a watery, happy sound that moves through him and bubbles to the surface. Naruto's never been one to mope, and it's rare for him to allow the depth of his feelings to be seen by others, especially when they're like his. It isn't that he doesn't trust people, or that he's ashamed of the way he feels- but instead that Naruto's will- his abject refusal to settle is what's kept him going for so long that he can't allow himself to stall. There had never been someone behind him back home. There hadn't been parents to tell him they were proud of him, or siblings to tell him that things would be alright. As a child his peers were encouraged to ignore or avoid him- because of what he was, because of what that monster had done to the village.

Naruto has always been picking himself back up. He doesn't resent it because it's all he's known, because the alternative had been laying down to die, or to accept that he should be overlooked. I'm not a nuisance and I'm not some kind of germ! he'd shouted once. I'll become Hokage so that everyone will be forced to acknowledge me!

It's always been about impossible dreams. About sharing those impossible dreams with others.

People aren't that different, he thinks. Maybe the little things are, their individual histories and the things they care about, but they always care about something. No one wants to be alone. No one wants to be hurt.

A person is able to become truly strong when they wish to protect someone they cherish.

Back in his own body he's aware of Bolin's chin on the crown of his head, of his face pressed into his neck. Of the way their arms lock. It occurs to him that he's never been hugged like this before, and then somehow... somehow he's not sure that a hug is the right word for it. And then he realizes, this is what it looks like when someone cares about your feelings. This is Bolin, who came here because he was sad, being kind to him because they're friends. It isn't really one person taking care of the other- but he's not sure when he's felt this before- the opportunity for him to be sad with someone else. To sit with those feelings and not have an answer for them, but not to drown in them either. Naruto's shoulders relax, hands sliding to rest on Bolin's biceps and just lingering there, holding on.]

Hime-chan said she's gonna help me make a big garden.

You should help us too. We'll need lots of hands. She's never really grown plants before, and even though I have, I've never done something that big.

[sediments]

[ It is an unusual type of embrace. Bolin has never been afraid of contact, especially once he understands someone to be his friend. It's an expression of closeness; an admission of emotion without words. He's never held Korra, Asami, or - he can't even imagine this - Mako while lying in bed. Though if he'd ever needed him to, he would. It's unusual and different, but it's not weird or unnatural. If this is how his friendship with Naruto is going to be, then that's all there is to it.

Bolin's existence itself might not be outside the norm, but he doesn't bother restricting himself or analyze his actions by some standard of "normal". (Doesn't bother to think or reflect at all, really.) He cherishes relationships for what they are, the closer the better.

He likes feeling close to someone. ]

A big garden? Where are you going to do that? [ His tone is light as his contentment wavers, remembering strongly the garden that Adrasteius had been so intent on—remembers napping in that garden sometimes after training.

He picks back up, excited at the prospect of something that would make Sakura and Naruto happy. ]

I'll help. Are you getting a house after all?

[acknowledges]

[There are little lines in his face now, from the creases of the sheets pressed into his skin and the strange fold they're making- tucked into one another. It doesn't occur to Naruto, in this moment, that this is the kind of embrace he'd been wanting for years- this full bodied awareness of another person. The sense of safety, of being understood, of not being for anything. All his life he's been trying to grow- to outgrow the boy he'd been, to outgrow his shortcomings and the things he couldn't do or understand. He's always been trying to be more. More for the village and for his team and for Sakura-chan and for Sasuke and for his sensei and for his mentor and for everyone but himself.

It won't occur to him that this purely selfish moment had been something special until long after its over. Maybe until he's climbing in bed for the night and smells Bolin's shampoo on the pillow.

He pulls back slow, because he thinks abstractly, that he's supposed to.]

I don't really know that part yet, and I still don't think I'm gonna get a house. But I think it'll be fun to work on something like that. When I was younger I always thought it'd be kinda nice to garden with somebody else.